


Hail Mary, full of grace.

by xha1



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Character Study, Drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:15:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29501178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xha1/pseuds/xha1
Summary: A study in Mary Winchester.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	Hail Mary, full of grace.

_Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen._

* * *

You’re a mother now. Your children will grow up different than you did. The deal you made hasn’t caught up with your family yet. Your job is to tuck the baby in and cut the crust off your toddlers sandwiches. This is the normal life you craved. This is the life you wanted right? This is the life you wanted when dad taught you how to load a shotgun at six. You try not to think about how John leaves for weeks at a time. Dean saw you crying the other day in the kitchen. Dean told you John loves you. Dean is tender and sweet like you never got to be. You smile and try not to think about how John doesn’t even know you. How can he love you? 

The baby monitor wakes you up in the middle of the night. Your time is up. He is here for Sam. John came home early. You didn’t get to reline the babys window with salt. Rookie Mistake, Campbell. You run headfirst towards your demise like so many before you. You were destined to go out just like everyone else in your family. You can buy time. You can confront your sin and John will get Sammy out. You flew too close to the sun and now you’re burning. This was worth it, right? Your boys have John. They won't grow up like you did. 

You burned but you’re alive. Your children are old. Your children are older than you ever got to be. They are haunted. They idolize you. They grew up with you as a madonna. You’re so much more than that. Are they disappointed? Are they as lost as you? Are they looking at you trying to find traces of the past like you do with them? You search for your children in their haunted eyes. You knew exactly how to tuck Sam in so that he slept peacefully. You knew Dean loved to sing the alphabet backwards. You don’t know anything about the men your children are. You'll learn.

Your children grew up with shotguns full of rocksalt. Your children grew up in motels. You relate to them in ways you never wanted to. You learn more. You learn how Satan found a home in your baby. He has since vacated. Your youngest feels unclean tainted by demon blood. You told your oldest angels were watching over him. An angel pulled him from hell. Your boys stop apocalypses. You are Mary the mother of saviors. You have never felt less holy. It was worth it, right? Your boys had John. They have grown up like you did. 


End file.
